Picking out Lexi's Headstone

Starting this blog and sharing my story has blessed me time and time again. I've made a new friend and been able to help her (i hope;)) with preparing for the day her baby was going to be born with the same condition to now having to go through the pain and emotions after they're gone. I've also been touched by another complete stranger who came across my blog and read my story and was inspired to message me and tell me her and her husband wanted to help Josh and I to be able to get a headstone for Lexi. She was an answer to my prayers. Because of her and her husbands generosity I was able to go and pick out Lexi's headstone this week. I was so happy and excited, but wasn't quite sure where to begin. I don't have any experience in this department, which is a good thing, but this is truly a big decision and a really tough one. In your mind you just want it to be perfect.

So I started with the basics. I knew I had to get a flat marker because of the plot we picked out for lexi. I started looking online at grass markers. A lot of the stuff I saw online some looked kinda I duno the right word, but it wasn't fitting for me personally. I originally wanted to put her photo on it, but I was told on the flat markers they get run over by the lawn mower and the cemetarty doesn't like them particuarly because then there responsible to relace them. Another place showed me a way they do it that they shouldn't break, but I duno if she was just trying to sale me on it because thats the vibe I was getting (I'm in sales so I can kinda tell) And it was just extra money, so I decided to go with something different. If I was doing a upright one, I probably would have done a pic though. A friend from my Angel Watch group told me to call my cemetary and see what they do and they should be able to give me numbers of other places locally. When I called my cemetary he just told me they don't do anything with flat markers, he told me I could order locally or from somewhere else. When I asked what if I order online he started telling me the rules and at the point I didn't want to write any of it down, so finding a local monument place was my answer. I found two here in St. George. After visiting and asking questions to both, like costs, what kind of designs can you do, what type of stone to use, ect. I chose to go with the family owned business of Utah Monument. When they helped me they just seemed like they truly cared about me and my little girl and they were more personable. A dad and son helped me, the fathers mother had just passed away last week and she was the one who started this business and they just seemed more passionate about there work and what they do in honor of her. The other place was nice, but I felt a little more pressure and more like they were trying to get me to choose what they wanted me to choose and they were more pricey.

Anyway I did that driving around on Teusday. Wednesday Josh and I made are decision who to use and I knew what I wanted to do and went back to Utah Monument to place the order and make it happen. I also have to say Thank you to my mom and dad. They made it possible so we could add on a metal flower vase that will be in the cement above her marker in the center so we can bring lexi flowers a little easier. After placing my order I left and out of no where my emotions were started to go haywire. There was something different about just looking around and asking questions, to actually ordering the headstone. It made the reality sink in again and made me very emotional. Let's just say I was sobbing like a little girl. Mostly from a mix of emotions. Missing Lexi and wishing she was here, but so greatful and happy I could do this little piece of the puzzle which is much needed for a grieving mother, and stress with just the everyday life and how the economy is right now. It just all hit me at once.

But I survived that night and the next morning I go a call from Utah Monument. They said the design could take a week and then bam they call me the next day and say well your designs ready! The son told he actually started working on it the moment I left. They have a lot going on with how his grandmother just passed away and his dad's busy and of course it got them a little behind, so since he was waiting for his dad on some bigger projects he had the perfect opening to stay busy and work on mine. I wasn't disappointed at all. I was happy to go in and see how the design came together.

Here's a pic of the design.

I love how it turned out! It's pretty much how I pictured it. Everything on it has lots of meaning to us. And here's how I got my inspiration.

As some of my facebook friends know this is a necklace my sister inlaw Becca gave me. It say's A Moment A Our Arms, A Lifetime in our Hearts and there's baby footprints in the middle. So I shorted that saying to Moment in our arms, Forever in our hearts. And for the footprints on there I took a copy of Lexi's foot prints and they outlined it so it's her actual size.

For her name I had to throw "Lexi" in there because that's what we always call her. Just like her bear is Lexi bear.

Then I wanted Christ or something on there if I could and most clipart wasn't my favorite, then I just happened to get so lucky that Utah Monument had this exact image. It was on Lexi's program and I had a larger image in my home, so it was Perfect!!!

Then last but not least I had them put Josh & Amber's Angel. My same friend from Angel Watch had something like that on her little girls headstone and it was just perfect. That's exactly what lexi is to us. When we talk to our kids we talk about how she's our Angel. So it was perfect!!

They said they should have the stone done in a week, but then they have to put the cement around it and the flower hole and so it takes about a month to get to the cemetary! But they will call me next week when the engraving is done. I'm excited to see how it turns out!

And a question to anyone that may know this. If you walk around the cemetary you see how dirty these precious stones can get, with the hard water and heat and all. Utah Monument told me when it's new putting baby oil on it can help with the hard water and just trying to make sure you remember to keep doing that every once and awhile. Does anyone else have any suggestions or know how to keep these things clean the best you can?